1) Floss. It is essential for good dental hygiene. 2) Take a long walk now and then
3) Eat several servings of fruit a day. 4) Don't drink caffeine before bed.
5) Attempt to sleep at least seven hours a night and 6) Accept that he / she is never
coming back. 7) Accept that the past is irreparable and dwelling on it will
change nothing. 8) Dwell on it anyway, and then move on.
10) Travel alone, if you can. Avoid the tourist traps, learn one to ten and
please and thank you in the local language, and you've already surpassed
90% of all the tourists who have ever been there before you. 11) Acquire new
talents for the sake of acquiring them. If you're young, learn an instrument if
possible you will never have this much free time ever again. 12) Exercise at least
three times a week- vigorously. 13) Buy clothes that fits
properly you'll notice the difference in your dating life. 14) Always check your
system has the specs to run the game. ~fukh~ 15) Always check the milk is in date ~fukh~
16) Always check the lid hasn't fallen down ~fukhhh~ 17) Accept there will be whole weeks
when you understand nothing and everything hurts except sometimes stupid
people get lucky, and sometimes smart people never make it.
18) Accept that girl in class likely isn't going to strike up a conversation first,
but if you do it will probably go alright. 20) Accept that just because it's
weird, doesn't mean it's clever. 21) Accept that
George Lucas does deserve respects regardless of the prequels. 22) Accept it's
okay if you can't use chopsticks and 23) Accept that there is a set point in the
future, after your death when you'll be thought about for the final time by a
friend or family member and then forgotten from history forever... (unless you become a meme ofc)
24) Spend more time with your parents if they're alive. Even if they are nob-ends,
there will come a time when they will be gone, and there will be no one to phone
home to, no more hugs, no more bickering, no more in-jokes from your childhood.
25) Argue about politics if you must, but accept that the other person won't
change their view if you start being a dick besides even from a tactical
perspective being nice is always more likely to persuade someone anyway.
26) Follow cutting-edge physics if you have the time. It is the process of humans
learning to speak fluent universe. 27) Accept that expensive whiskey is almost always
worth the money. 28) Accept that expensive running shoes that almost never worth
the money. 29) Accept that youtubers and online personalities are often people
who couldn't get into the field they wanted to. Do not take their word as gospel.
Especially pretentious advice from disembodied smart-ass narrators, whose
life is probably considerably duller than yours...mhm... 30) Attempt to tolerate meta
humor? 31) Accept that no one is in charge, not properly and no one has a handle on
any of this; Not even Stephen Fry. 32)Avoid the new season of Twin Peaks if you wish
to conserve your sanity, watch it if not. 33) Come to terms with the fact that there
is probably no absolute truth that you'll grasp in your lifetime. However, if
someone at the party tries to tell you everything is relative, invite them to
exit the building from the 5th floor and see if gravity is also a social fucking
construct. 34) Do not be intimidated by people who use long words- they are
likely more insecure about their own intelligence than you are.
Instead afford them your most "effervescently magnanimous approbation"
35) Before tidying up, make the bed, suddenly everything will
seem easier. 36) Visit the dentist at regular intervals. 37) Read Ray Bradbury. Always.
38) Do not purchase cheap Cellotape. It is about time someone stuck it to those
bastards. 39) Embrace your own eccentricity(weirdness) What made you a freak as a kid, will
likely make you an interesting adult. 40) Learn the names and positions of at
least four constellations. I recommend Orion, Ursa Minor, Ursa Major, and Cassiopeia.
This is guaranteed to be useful in a romantic setting at some point.
41)Try to eat less salt. 42) Try to eat more vegetables, 43) Try to accept that happiness isn't a
constant state, nor does it come for free. It is a chemical reward for hard work
and to get more of it one has to do more.. hard work. This applies to careers,
relationships, friendships, and especially Factorio™
44) Diet if you want to, but acknowledge that all diets- however elaborate- are all
variations on eat less, move more. 45) Keep a journal if you have time, it'll serve as
a snapshot for how silly your life decisions are right now, and you can read
it in ten years and chuckle and write some more and then you can read that in
another 10 years and have another chuckle. ~great fun!~ 46) If you're of legal age,
VOTE for Christ's sake™ 47) Attempt to locate your passions. When you locate them, see
if they can be monetized. If they can, congratulations you've just discovered
your career. Prepare for crippling failure. It is the ultimate character
building, and almost no one successful has ever avoided it happening to them
multiple times. 49) If something terrible befalls you, and you think nothing this
bad has ever happened to anyone ever before, remember it has, worse, repeatedly
and to almost everyone. They got through it. Some of them are probably going
through it right now, they just haven't told you. You will
almost certainly, be fine. 50) Stay away from synthetic weed. 51) Resist the appeal of
depressing nihilism- if everything is pointless, you may as well just be in a
good mood anyway. :') 52) Grow some kind of novelty facial hair if
necessary, but don't get all uppity when no one takes you seriously. In the words
of John Waters- 53) "If you go home with somebody and they don't have books...
...don't fuck 'em" ™. 54) Spend good money on mattresses. 55) Don't put sugar in someone else's tea
unless specifically requested to. 56) Do not dig down.
57) Ignore all of the previous instructions...
..Except this. 58) And most important and vital to happy living
without parallel- floss™ it is essential for good dental hygiene