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Oh wow.
This is it!
This was worth it this morning, coming up here.
JOEY: Yeah, how does it feel?
I'M THE KING OF THE WORLD! AHAHAHAHAHA.
Hey guys, welcome back to Journey Across Japan,
never-ending cycle of despair.
If you haven't been watching, we've been cycling around.
Joey's been joining me the last three or four days,
how are your legs, Joey?
JOEY: Ah, my legs are fine, actually.
CHRIS: What happened here?
JOEY: I hurt myself...on the bouncy castle thing on the first day.
CHRIS: Really?
JOEY: Yeah.
CHRIS: Didn't see that.
JOEY: When we did, like the shooting...like, skit?
CHRIS: It seems you've...
CHRIS: It seems you've...outlived your contract.
*BANG*
CHRIS: ...Oh, yeah.
JOEY: ...we did, I don't know if you put that in the video.
I hurt myself doing that, so.
CHRIS: Aww.
Poor Joey, the sacrifices he's made for these videos.
Incalculable.
CHRIS: So we're currently in the rural town of Kashiwazaki
and today we're heading to Joetsu,
which is about 40 kilometers south.
If you're wondering why there's a Nintendo 64 controller strapped to my bike.
or a weird...mask thing on Joey's bike,
you can go back and watch yesterday's video,
it's all explained there,
...better than I ever could.
JOEY: Alright, here we go!
Give us something good, Anpanman's crotch.
CHRIS: So these are challenges that you guys are sending in.
Our crew, our team have curated them.
Put the best 4 or 5 into this machine.
And today we've got...
JOEY: This is from SimonJF89.
It says every 30 minutes, you need to quote an 80's or 90's film quote.
We have to try and like, fit it into a casual conversation.
Like, you can't just bust out a quote out of random.
CHRIS: Absolutely.
CHRIS: The weather's certainly on our side today though.
It's very sunny, which means we need to plaster ourselves in..
a ton of sunscreen.
JOEY: Can I have some of that?
CHRIS: You want sunscreen?
JOEY: I'm entitled to.
CHRIS: You want sunscreen?!
JOEY: I want the sunscreen!
CHRIS: YOU CAN'T HANDLE THIS SUNSCREEN!
*ding*
JOEY: I've already put some on.
JOEY: So we spent an evening here in Kashiwazaki, but...
What was your favorite thing about it?
CHRIS: My favorite thing...was...
I think my favorite thing was the...
JOEY: I DON'T REMEMBER ASKING YOU A GODDAMN THING.
*ding*
CHRIS: What it's gonna be like...
For the whole day. *Joey laughing*
CHRIS: So it begins.
Let's go.
*grunt*
JOEY: Let's go! WOO!
CHRIS: I can take him!
argh
No!
dammit
CHRIS: Ugghh.
I'm so...knackered.
My legs are killing.
CHRIS: Joey, nice struggling.
Struggling to get up a really steep hill.
Every five minutes.
Today's been brutal.
JOEY: Yeah.
CHRIS: Absolutely brutal.
JOEY: The last, like, two days has been mostly flat.
But today was just nothing but hills.
So even though we haven't traveled this far, we're...
more fucked...
...than we were a few days ago.
UGGGHH.
*grunt*
CHRIS: Joey.
Are you okay?
JOEY: No.
I'm quite fucking far from okay.
CHRIS: What are we gonna do now?
JOEY: What are we gonna do now?
There is no...
There is no we.
*ding*
CHRIS: We're halfway now to Joetsu,
and we've stopped at this little lover's sanctuary spot.
Randomly in the middle of our journey.
It's perched on the top of this rather nice-looking cliff.
And there's lots of chains and love hearts around.
Erm, I must admit the chains do look a bit sinister.
These rusty chains.
Wrapped around.
But it is a very romantic spot.
So it seems fitting that I should come here with, er...
...with Joey.
CHRIS: Yeah, Joey, get up here, the view's pretty good.
JOEY: How'd you get up there?
CHRIS: Do you trust me?
JOEY: What?
CHRIS: Do you trust me?
..
...
Nah.
*record scratch* CHRIS: Oh, alright then.
*ding*
CHRIS: Eating his ice cream.
Here you go.
Something we both agree on.
JOEY: "Joey and Chris love the 80's."
CHRIS: We both agree on that.
JOEY: We sure do.
CHRIS: And there's a padlock!
JOEY: Okay.
CHRIS: So it will stay mortalized on the rusty fence forever.
JOEY: And then do we throw the key into the ocean?
CHRIS: Yeah.
JOEY: Is that how it works?
CHRIS: It is now.
*snickering*
CHRIS: I wanted to find the rustiest chain we possibly could, and this is it.
This is it, right here.
There's loads of hearts, they've just been smashed to pieces and weathered away.
So our one, our nice bright shiny,
"Joey and Chris love the 80's" heart,
JOEY: Which we do.
CHRIS: Will stand out as a beacon of hope!
CHRIS: Look how rusty this is, this is horrible.
JOEY: You were the one who wanted to find the rusty one.
CHRIS: This is disgusting.
*sounds of awe*
CHRIS: Whoa!
Stop everything, this is-
Look at this!
Giant praying mantis!
*camera shutter noises*
CHRIS: Look at the size of that praying mantis!
Oh my Christ!
That is massive.
CHRIS: That's the biggest praying mantis I've ever seen.
The female praying mantis eats the male after they've, er, reproduced,
so it seems rather fitting that we're at this romantic lovers', uh,
Romantic lovers' point.
One insect that eats its partner.
JOEY: Just made an incredible discovery.
CHRIS: Yeah?
JOEY: This key that we used to lock our love for the 80's...
CHRIS: Mmm.
JOEY: unlocks...
almost all of these locks!
*laughter*
CHRIS: That's terrible!
JOEY: I just loosened one of them and I just quickly put it back, and I'm like "Oh."
CHRIS: That's a pretty big design flaw.
JOEY: That is a design...
CHRIS: So we could unshackle
JOEY: If we were... CHRIS: the love of all these hearts.
JOEY: True...
loveless dicks.
JOEY: Then we could easily just go around and unlock all of these.
CHRIS: You have the key.
JOEY: I have the key to everyone's hearts.
CHRIS: Oh wow.
This is it!
This was worth it this morning, coming up here.
JOEY: Yeah, how does it feel?
I'M THE KING OF THE WOOOORLD!
AHAHAHAHAHA.
CHRIS: We've just stopped for lunch at this little place called Fisherman's Wharf.
They've got like a,
Some sort of museum with loads of cool stuff in that looks like...
It feels like we just walked onto the set of Pirates of the Caribbean or something.
Look at this treasure chest!
It's amazing.
CHRIS: When Ian saw this treasure chest, his eyes lit up.
Like that.
*thunk*
CHRIS: You're gonna need a bigger boat!
*ding*
Ohh!
Now we're talking!
CHRIS: I've never seen you eat something so quickly.
JOEY: I fucking love sashimi like no tomorrow.
CHRIS: One of the benefits of cycling down the sea of Japan is you get nice fresh seafood.
But I'm enjoying today's challenge.
Been quite fun.
CHRIS: As of the next few days, or now,
I'm not sure when we're doing it.
You can actually see other challenges that've been posted to the site, so keep them coming.
Have a look at what other people have written.
If your challenge does get selected,
you actually get to win something.
JOEY: What do you win?
CHRIS: You win a T-shirt.
Tokyo Creative T-shirt.
JOEY: Ooh!
CHRIS: Ooh!
JOEY: I don't have one of those.
CHRIS: You wanna see second prize?
JOEY: Yeah
*knife sound*
CHRIS: Second prize is a set of steak knives.
Third prize is...
Third prize is...you're fired.
*ding*
JOEY: So we're about to go on this highway over here,
and it's really, really narrow, really close to the cars.
A little bit scared, not gonna lie.
*clacking noises*
CHRIS: My calculations are correct.
When this baby hits 88 miles per hour,
*more clacking*
You're gonna see some serious shit.
*ding*
Let's go.
CHRIS: Well guys, we made it to Joetsu just before sundown,
and it looks like Joey's got us a delicious treat to celebrate.
*bell dinging*
JOEY: Life is like a box of chocolates.
...You never know what you're gonna get.
*ding*
*laughter*
CHRIS: Well guys, we've had a lot of fun today.
What was your highlight of the day, Joey?
JOEY: (muffled) Eating this box of chocolates.
CHRIS: I quite liked the romantic lookout point.
I have to say that was cool.
JOEY: That was cool.
CHRIS: And I certainly enjoyed all the quotes.
Lots of good memories of some good films there.
If you guessed what all the films are, go ahead and write in the comments.
Try and get all the quotes, I think there's about ten or something?
If you do write them in the comments and you get them all right,
I will highlight the first ten comments that I see where you got them all correct.
JOEY: You also get a box of chocolates!
CHRIS: Yeah, free box of chocolates as well!
Tomorrow is Joey's last day of the trip.
JOEY: Yeah.
CHRIS: It's very sad.
No matter where you might be watching from out there in the big wide world,
thanks for joining our trip and we hope to see you tomorrow.
Have a good one.
JOEY: Bye!
*bell dinging*
CHRIS: Er Joey, can you chuck me one of those chocolates?
JOEY: Ah.
Sorry.
All out.
*thud*
CHRIS: That's not true.
THAT'S IMPOSSIBLE!
nooooooooooo
Ow.
Fuck.
*bell ding*
CHRIS: Anybody wanna see second prize?
JOEY: Dropping your hashi...
for the second time.
CHRIS: Second prize is a set of steak knives.
Third prize is...
*laughter*
...You're fired.